So how've I dealt with the change? Change for everyone elicits anxiety in different capacities…some of us dive in and are fueled by the adrenaline for weeks (hand raised) only to have the hormonal nosedive post partum and sit in your driveway saying “Hey there Tom! Have a great weekend” to your neighbors and think WTF who the hell am I??? This was all too much all at once. But as I sit here today, on these comfy chairs that are in the family room I’ve always wanted, looking out over the green grass lawn that’s only manicured to the point where it perfectly maintains the footprints of our active toddler and a swingset of a tykes dream…I am so grateful…so fulfilled by today’s hours even though I’m beyond tired from fragmented sleep. On most days, I’m shaking salt & pepper on a hard boiled egg and shoving it in my mouth in two bites because the littles both have to eat and if I don’t do the hard boiled egg thing I’ll get shakey and milk production needs calories and oh crap did I drink enough water yet today? All of it, it’s exhaustive work this mother of 2 thing. But I couldn't be luckier that it has been bestowed upon me to raise these girls of mine with Lee…in this house…full of love and a lot of candy. Because candy cigarettes (yep, you read that right) are my weird snack habit and make me happy;)
Milly is a dream. One of those babies I heard existed but didn’t realize I’d have one. You know the kind that fall asleep in the car or in the carseat or in the stroller and just sortof drift off. And regardless of when their naps fall during the day even at 5pm they are still fairly pleasant…no witching hour here sans a few squawks that signal the end of the evening and that I’ll get a glass of wine soon. Because as I read recently somewhere “Motherhood: Powered by Love, Fueled by Coffee, Sustained by Wine.” If tattoos weren’t permenant, I’d get that somewhere visible for all to see. My post partum expereince so far has been a 180* from before likely a product of medication, perspective, second time parenting and natural sunlight flooding our house. Being blessed with the chance to experience a newborn from this side of the fense is blissful in comparison.
But back to this new sweet babe…oh is she scrumptious. Nursing issues plagued us at first which became the only big hiccup since having her. Her delivery? Smooth and speedy! Got to the hospital just in time to get that epidural (not without some serious amazon-woman screams) and delivered her 2.5hrs after arriving and in just a few pushes. It was peaceful and dare I say relaxing? Both girls have had such uniquely calm life entrances, clear moments I’ll never forget each and every moment of as the years go on….
So much to catch you up on, but for now. This is it. The great adventure rolls on as does my expensive eye cream 2x a day because of, well, #sleepdeprivationdarkcircleslikewhoa.